Secret Love Letters

By ” I ” (From my sunny place)

Dear “A”,

How are things? Any news? How’s your little boy doing? I hope everything is fine. Oh, by the way, wishes of a happy 2019 with loads of health to you and your family!

I am writing this email because I wanted to confess that during all these years apart I have never been able to stop thinking about you. I certainly tried to go out with other people and to move on with my life. Nothing helped.

I still miss you a lot, although I am not quite sure what to do with this. I miss the vision of your blue eyes, your small hands, your red lips, your classy demeanor, even your moodiness.

Your mysterious bittersweet scent too.

How many nights have I spent awake thinking of you? How many times have I talked to you, as if you were right next to me? This was my odd way of keeping you alive and nearby, as absurd as it may sound.

You know what: deep down I always regretted the fact that we couldn’t communicate well enough with each other back in those days at school, for whatever reason.

Despite this fact, I’ve always been ‘crossing my fingers’ regarding your life and projects here where I am now settled, even if the idea of you meeting someone new always haunts me.

This thought makes me sad but perhaps also a bit happy, as you could thus find some happiness in your own life. I don’t want you to be unhappy.

With this letter I only wanted to share how much you mean to me, although I suspect this makes absolutely no difference whatsoever anymore.

After all, so many years have gone by, so many miles are separating us… and I never had the courage to say that I love you.

Do you ever think of me?

I will say no more. I wish you all the very best in life to you and yours. No need to reply to this letter, as I will never have the courage to send it to you.

Goodbye. I.


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