by ‘ R ‘
I write this letter to you as a thought exercise to understand why you have suddenly become the object of my obsession. How suddenly you have come to occupy my every waking conscious thought of my mortal existence.
How suddenly you have become the subject of my dreams.
I find you to be electric. Your energy is unlike anything that I have ever encountered. It is infectious. And it has consumed me.
Before we ever spoke, I noticed you immediately.
I noticed that you were someone who was trying to get better. I noticed that you were young but I also noticed that you were hard working. The sweat on the ground next to my own was proof of that.
I noticed that you challenged yourself, but did so intelligently. I noticed you would push your limits but you wouldn’t risk injury at the cost of your ego. And that maturity is what makes you different from the rest. That maturity is what will give you longevity in this game.
I noticed that you chose to live your life the same way I have chosen to live my life.
Not because it is an easy life. No. In fact, I would say it is quite a difficult life. A harsh life. Because it is a life of accountability. A life of discipline. A life where you are your own worst tormentor. A demanding life where you are your own harshest critic. A mortal life where you must surrender to the limits of your own flesh.
But ultimately a noble life.
Because you seek nothing less than the shattering of those boundaries in the pursuit of your own evolution. A courageous life. Because it is one which embraces the chaos beyond and fights in the hopes of achieving a stronger person.
An addicted life. Because it was the original way you first began to show yourself love, and it is now all that you know.
I noticed that you had come to the same realization I had come to so many years ago. The realization that happens too late for many if even at all.
That there was never actually a choice at all – You live or you don’t. And instead of enduring your waking death like so many others. You chose to live the same art I have given myself to. And I respect that. I tell everyone the same thing – I wish I started sooner.
I noticed you were like me. This was of course, after I had noticed I your crazy leg tattoos that no other normal teenager would reasonably have. And this was of course after I had noticed those dorky little glasses that make you look like a sexy school teacher. And this was of course after I had noticed your sweet little behind in those cute little shorts that go a just little too high. I noticed you immediately and I hope that you have noticed me too.
And now you have spoken to me. And now I am LOST.
There is so much to like about your personality, I don’t even know where to start.
You are so confident. You are bold. You are open and have shared with me your pain. I love it. You uplift the world by picking heavy things up. I like it.
As a courageous woman continue to be a beacon of knowledge and empowerment. I celebrate you and your message. Your energy gives me courage, you give me strength and you’ve shared my pain.
So this is what it is. A love letter from a grown man.
This connection is undeniable. Cosmically brought to me.
This is a love letter from a 27 year old grown man.
I want you to go to live a full life in college. There are so many memories coming – good and bad that will make you into the person you are meant to be.
I’m not going to hold you back.
Understand what I am offering. A lifelong memory that can only happen now. In this specific moment of time.
You know what I want. What do you want?
I have seen too many lesser men lash out at women they cannot have. And I will not put forth that kind of hate into this world.
Be you. And thrive.
You like what you like and pretending otherwise is dishonest and hurtful to myself.
Do not take lightly the joy in which our love can bring to this world. Something remarkable.
There are things that I want in this world which only you can make happen. We can bring magic in to this world.
I would love to spend what little time you have before you go, with you.
We can pretend like there was nothing between us and we can go about our regular existence – we can work out together and continue to flirt and pass this off as another curiosity.
Imagine the love we can bring into this world.
Look you know what I want and that’s probably not going to change.
Two young incredible beautiful people who would be unstoppable.